Saturday, November 17, 2018

Everyday Intention?

I woke up this morning thinking about what my intention was for this gray Saturday.  I thought about what events were on my calendar, what the family would want to accomplish, and what was in the fridge. I checked my phone - any texts that I need to answer?  What’s new of interest on Pinterest? - anything worthy of a Shoe Love post or WhattoWear?  Marc and Blu woke up and intention quickly turned to conversation and watching CBS This Morning Saturday: Shout out to my girl, Michelle!  Loved the red dress, by the way. WAIT! Have I already lost track of my intention for the day? 

For anyone who has read a post from Iyanla, seen a Super Soul Sunday, or knows a Life Coach has seen, heard, or been told to start everyday with an Intention and to make it happen.  What does that mean?  How much time does it take to determine your intention?  When should you do so?  If you are lucky and can carve out a few minutes for yourself in the morning in the shower, between yelling for the kids to “get in the car”, or as you are running into the office to make that last minute 8:30 meeting with your boss then Kudos to you.  If not, does this mean that your day is without merit?  Are you aimless and missing the journey to Magnificence?  

As I was flipping through my Facebook page this morning I came across a post from last week that made me think…"What was my intention on that day?"  The post read “When you learn, teach, when you get, give.” A quote from the late great Maya Angelou.  When I saw this quote it spoke to me as my Mom would speak to me - deep and with care to continually challenge myself to be a better human.  It made me think to myself, "is this what you do?"  And because it spoke to me, I posted it. My post got quite a few “likes” and an unexpected response from a professional acquaintance in the Bridal industry whom I met over a decade ago. She thanked me for being kind, commenting “ You have always been that… I've never forgotten. Thank you.”   

Her words humbled me and then they made me think. Did I start the day that I met her with an intention?  If so, what was my intention?  Was it to be kind? What was it?  If it was intentional shouldn't I know what it was??!   Was my day planned out or did I just step out on faith and follow the path? I couldn't remember the day, but if it was Bridal Fashion week I was most certainly harried and stressed out wondering whether or not the editors would love my new collections. Wondering if we could beat our sales goals. Actually, looking back, that was probably my intention; making that money!  But none of that is what lasted. Priscilla of Boston shuttered in 2011. Many, if not most of the editors who saw and loved the collections are no longer with their publications - if the publications even still exist. I am no longer in the bridal industry and don’t hear from many who still are. The one thing that did last, was kindness. And it's made all the difference.  

If we can be unintentionally kind then what does that mean about the opposite?  That is a discussion for another day.

I believe that even if you can’t set daily intentions you can live an intentional life.  My intention everyday is to learn something new, make a difference in some way to someone somewhere, and, my guilty pleasure; some time to find a fabulous pair of shoes.  

#Lifegoals
#Spiceteria
#kloth92
#intentionsetting
#goodintentions

Monday, June 27, 2011

Mom, Irreplaceable; Popsicle, Priceless

The summer is here, and I’ve made a concerted effort to leave the office by 6 pm so that I am home for some outdoor fun with the kids- taking a walk, bike riding, etc. After just 3 days of this time together, the boys have been much more enjoyable to be around and much more attached to me – especially Carter, my 6-year-old.

So, the boys are getting ready to visit my in-laws for a long weekend and we are laying across my bed talking about the trip, and Carter says, “ I don’t want to go, I want to stay with Mommy. I want to play with Mommy, I want Mommy to go with us, I want…” and Jonathan says, “ I want a Popsicle!” Ah, a child’s unconditional love.

The next day I get to the office - stay with me, I need to set the scene- and I sit in my all-glass office just off of the elevator by a front desk supposedly manned by my “assistant (anyone who knows me should be laughing by now). I am frequently on the floor by myself, so I ask that he always close the door when he leaves the floor.

OK, back to the story – I am on the phone with a colleague and I see that my assistant has walked away, the front door is open and a stranger is walking the floor from office to office…into my office. Yes, it is glass, I am on the phone and my door is closed. Well, this young man in a suit, 3 sizes too large, eyes askew, an obvious brain injury (he has a dent), and carrying a BIG dirty red backpack walks into my office and announces loudly, “I am here for the interview!” Then takes the BIG backpack from his shoulder and pulls out a chair and sits down. (What is in that bag?). Just as he launches into his ‘interview for an unknown company at this address’ (I asked) my phone caller tells me that she has to go. I am thinking NO, NO! You can’t get off of the phone; there is a potential killer in my office. I need a witness in case something happens to me, and something might because I am not conducting interviews. Instead of saying that and alerting the PK (potential killer) of my fear, I franticly try to keep her from hanging up, yet maintaining a smile for the PK. “No, you don’t need to go. Didn’t you say there were 10 things you needed to discuss – we’ve only covered one.” To this, she says, “no I’m good, thanks for your help, need to go through security” In desperation, I say “ Priscilla needs us to discuss her presentation” (this is a ridiculous statement because Priscilla died in 2003), so I’m hoping that she picks up on it and will ask to call for help or at least stay on the phone. No luck – “I’ll call you when I land” Click. Think fast – he’s still here! All I can think is I’ve finally gotten to a place of almost work/family balance and this crazy PK has walked into my office! That’s perfect – of all of the offices in this busy city how in the hell did he find mine? Why? What will happen to my boys if he starts shooting? Mom, irreplaceable.

I snap back to reality, the BIG backpack still on the floor and he starts his “interview” with “My reading, writing and math are basic but I want you to show me how to be an administrative assistant. (What is in that damned bag?). I want to make between $30,000 and $50,000.” My assistant finally comes back and I introduce the candidate, then I call HR to ask if they actually put the office address on the job posting. Based on their answer, I tell my assistant to give the candidate HR’s contact information for follow up.

As I reflected on the day this encounter made me terribly sad – as bold as we think we are, the reality is that the world is a dangerous place and we can’t take anything or anyone for granted. There are so many people who need work but who aren’t willing to put themselves out there, yet this young man who, with all of his issues, was not only willing to put himself out there he knew exactly what he wanted. And it was definitely, not a Popsicle!

I get home and I’m exhausted- doesn’t matter to anyone but me because Carter and Jonathan are waiting for me to go bike riding. As we turn the corner on our neighborhood one-mile bike ride, I realize what I want… A Popsicle!

Saturday, May 21, 2011

Is this the End?

So its 8:33 pm Saturday night, May 21st – we are still here. Were you worried? I wasn’t – God gives us every day and when he decides it is our time, well, then we have to accept that. Evidently, there are more people who were worried than not. I went to Short Hills Mall and it was relatively empty. The word on the street was that people stayed home in preparation for the end of the world. There is no spice equivalent for this level of fear and lack of faith.

I am in the den with the boys watching High School Musical 3; Marc is in the office watching the Mets play the Yankees. If we don’t wake up tomorrow, we are together and we love each other.

The Real Housewives, Art and Show


The Real Housewives of NY are having a serious discussion about how hard it is to be “stuck” in the Hamptons with the kids without their significant others. How about being “stuck” in the South Bronx… sorry, I have been distracted by the TV.

Uh-oh another distraction, hearing little footsteps sneaking into the room (he doesn’t think I can hear him). Wait for it… Marc bellows, “Go to bed!!!” Little footsteps head in the opposite direction. Is he going back to bed? Nope, he thinks he’s tricking us – instead of coming directly into the den he sneaks in thru the living room and from behind the couch we hear, “Mom and dad, I can’t sleep.” “Just go to your room and rest until you fall asleep.” “But I don’t want to rest… I don’t want to sle(yawn)ep.” And sleeping he is... on Mommy’s chest.

Now, for art and show. Tonight was the elementary school’s annual art show and spring musical concert. It was very well attended, and hot. Yes, hot – lots of kids and parents, no air conditioning. I owe a major shout out and ode of appreciation to Marion and Robert (my parents, God rest their souls) who never missed a school concert, never missed an opportunity to clap loudly and give big hugs and encouraging words after pitchy, long and hot seasonal concerts. Luckily I have a 3rd grader and kindergartner (chorus/orchestra doesn’t starts until 4th grade) – I enjoyed the art show and listened to the concert from outside. So you ask, why did you stay after viewing the art? I stayed because I volunteered to co-chair the event, and since I work ridiculous hours and often don’t even know if I will be home at night, co-chairing meant making tent cards for 30 minutes on Monday and clean up on Thursday night.

Key ingredients for sanity –

· Embrace the term “co”, there is no super in Job-Having Entrepreneurial Mom Wife – you can’t do it by yourself.

· 5 minutes or 5 days a week – the kids appreciate your effort to be a part of their lives (though they probably won’t say it until they are 30)

· Pitchy is a key

Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Rain, Boots and Janice Huff

Rain, rain go away! Rain in the City brings out rain boots.

As I sat in Aureole waiting for my glass of chardonnay and waiting to catch up with a friend I haven’t seen in almost two years, I watched all of the workday weary New Yorkers hustle through the bustle to get home; to get drinks with friends; to get to their match.com dates and I couldn’t shake the thought of salt. Yes – salt.

Most of the women walking on 42nd St were wearing rain boots (as was I, more about that later), a ubiquitous commodity – much like salt. Just as there are different classes of salt, there are different classes of rain boots. The Hunter Wellie is the choice for fashionistas and utilitarians - much like Kosher salt, the choice of savvy cooks (fashionistas of the kitchen) because its coarse texture is easier to pinch when seasoning savory dishes, and its taste lasts longer when cooking. Colorful, patterned non-branded rain boots, while creative and stylish, are the table salt - common but add flavor, just the same. And of course I must mention the Burberry, Coach and Gucci rain boots – more like the gourmet black and pink salts.

I love fine things, especially apparel and accessories, and I absolutely love delicious well seasoned food – I’m partial to Brazilian rock salt (another story for another time)- but when it comes to my $20 silver zebra rain boots, I am more of the table salt variety. Why pay $200 or more for something that will just get rained on? Weigh in…

On a separate note – is anyone watching NBC NY news? Speaking of rain, Janice Huff. What’s up with the necklace, bracelet and belt? My advice. . . load on the accessories and always take one off before you walk out the door. . . or onto camera. BTW, the orange is a nice color.

Spicefully yours,

Kimberly

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

I Promise

It’s been forever since this Job-Having Entrepreneurial Mom Wife has seen you.

Where to start? My Spiceteria baby has been in hibernation for far too long. I continue to share my family secrets but via text or the very occasional telephone conversation. Basically, the secrets never leave my “test kitchen” aka children’s homework room, aka bill writing station, aka place that my family uses to breed additional clutter and drive me crazy, which I detest (a windy but spot on accurate description).

The barrage of job requirements and constant travel continue unabated; and of course, kids care less than a little about these competing demands- but should they? Really? How do I manage to do it all, you ask? I don’t.

I manage these demands (and my sanity, some-what) and keep enough done to get by. Anything else is unrealistic - and I am finally OK with that. Oprah and Martha aside, I’m quite satisfied with the results. But is it my “Best Life Ever”? I often drift off into my techno-color vision of being the Chief Creative Officer for a fabulous fashion company that I share ownership in; lunching with Gayle King (yes, Gayle – she’s fabulous!); taping my lifestyle makeover show and being home by 6:00 to review homework, talk to the boys, attend PTA events and spend romantic evenings with my husband; complimented by intellectually and fun filled times with my closest girlfriends.

What? Carter is missing…Jonathan, how did you lose your brother? I told you to stay in the backyard! Back to reality.

SO even though I am finally OK with keeping enough done to get by I never stop thinking about my ideas. . .

Good to be back – more to come soon. I promise!

Yours in spice,

Kimberly

Sunday, August 16, 2009

JUST LIKE THAT!


Have you missed me? I have missed you! Sorry for the long lag between posts but the Odyssey of Me, the Entrepreneurial Consulting Job Seeking Mom Wife, has become that of the Entrepreneurial Consulting Job Having Mom Wife - and just like that-six months later, I revived a dimension to my day - the return of balancing a NYC/Boston/Philadelphia job back into my balancing act.

The difference for me is that, now, I know the following:

1. Although I have always LOVED my boys, every day I actually looked forward to the time that we spent unencumbered by someone else’s demands and deadlines.

2. I relished the free mental space (if not the physical time) to think about building Saluda Spice Co.

3. My “labor of love” is really only now taking hold; and it has already been neglected. As I have had to rely on others to help pick up the slack, orders have gone unshipped, the website has not been updated in weeks and so adds to my balancing act.

4. If I am to become a contortionist and execute this intricately choreographed balancing act, I need to be in tip top condition which means, I need gym time 2 – 3 times a week and massages (I will finally force myself to use the $500+ of Massage Envy credits, dates with my husband and fun and relaxing times with my fellow Mom Wives.

I also now firmly believe that making decisions about what happens in my home, and with my boys, while I am not in it, will be much easier as a result of the time spent at home and the wonderful circle of supportive Mom Wives in friend network.

I am clearly not looking forward to time not being my own, however I believe that I’ll have a much clearer view of how I’d like to spend it:

Lesson 1: Massages, facials and mani/pedi’s are an indispensible part of life. Like air. You can spot the crazed wild-eyed stare of women who deny themselves this necessity. Bring them into the fold or avoid them at all costs.

Lesson 2: I will DVR The Real Housewives and sometimes even The Wendy Williams’ show – guilty pleasures!!

Lesson 3: The axiom is true, that job truly worth doing, must occasionally be completely blown off in favor of a quality and ample pour of Pinot, and anyone arguing otherwise is not to be trusted (And if that’s not the correct axiom, it should be).

Lesson 4: Any greater than three Lessons Learned per experience is probably wasted ink (and proof of a wasted lesson).

On the issue of good uses of time and spirits, I offer this:

One memory from my youth is watching Justain Wilson’s easy Orleans drawl and coaxing flavor, and his heavy hand as he cooked with and ‘sampled’ the wine he cooked with. But he was really onto something. A generous pour of wine, beer or whiskey or citrus (if you are dry) can be a fantastic flavor enhancer for you or the meat/poultry or fish you are preparing, and grant of delicious tenderizing for the time strapped Entrepreneurial Job Seeking or Having Mom Wife.

One glorious benefit to summer is the benefit of my husband’s prodigious grilling, and my quite willing eagerness to cede cooking time to him. Though lacking the medicinal benefit sampling wines, as I prepare marinade, I’m quite partial to lime- as is my family, and I think you will too.

Here’s a great, and nearly foolproof recipe to add a refreshing summer-crisp flavor to grilling selections:

Small Red onion sliced

½ Green and red pepper coarsely chopped

4 crushed garlic cloves

½ lb mushrooms

½ bushel of broccoli or Brussels sprouts (whichever you prefer)

4 Salmon filets or Tilapia or Boneless chicken breasts

Saluda Spice Co. Pepper Infused oil

In an envelope made of heavy aluminum foil or double- layered aluminum foil. Layer the veggies and liberally flavor with infused oil

Place fish or chicken on the veggie mixture sprinkle a little oil and a pinch of salt and pepper. Fold and cover the mixture with foil and place on the grill for about 20 minutes – med heat. Grab a glass of your favorite libation. Enjoy a healthy delicious meal.

Let me know how it comes out. Speak to you soon!